Miraculously smaller than the sum of its parts, The 355 is a patchwork quilt of frenetic action sequences, bound together with a largely nonsensical plot.
Clearly this glossy romp is meant to ape Bond and Bourne. A protracted setup involves the sale of some sort of ultra-technical macguffin that allows the user to hack any connected device, and crash planes and computer systems at whim. Scowling villain Jason Flemyng is super impressed and tries to obtain it, repeatedly. There’s quite a lot of running around, but no one seems to get anywhere.
Jessica Chastain plays Mace, a CIA operative sent to retrieve the nefarious tech, along with her agency partner Nick (Sebastian Stan), but comes a cropper when he switches sides. She duly partners with other female agents from rival secret services, also on the case, to complete her mission and kick his ass.
Directed and co-written by Simon Kinberg, based on a story by Theresa Rebeck, and produced by Jessica Chastain, the movie looks well-funded, and boasts some splendid location photography (France, Morocco, Shanghai), courtesy of DoP Tim Maurice-Jones.
The always listenable Tom Holkenberg delivers a fast-paced score, and tech credits overall are high.
The action choreography is similarly accomplished and the ensemble cast, comprising Lupita Nyong’o (as Khadijar), Penélope Cruz (Graciela), Bingbing Fan (Lin Mi Shen) and Diane Kruger (Marie Schmidt) are nothing if not committed.
There’s quite a lot of running around, but no one seems to get anywhere…
(from left) Marie (Diane Kruger), Mace (Jessica Chastain) and Khadijah (Lupita Nyong’o) in The 355
But as a female orientated actioner it lacks the wit of Gunpowder Milkshake, the slick invention of Black Widow, and the sheer violent physicality of Kate.
The movie rallies in its final act, with a drawn out slobberknocker in a luxury hotel, featuring energetic gunplay and eye-catching martial arts.
Three quarters of the way through I began to wonder why The 355 was so-called. There’s no real attempt to explain it, bar some throwaway dialogue in the final reel. Then I wondered what they might call a sequel – The 3552? Maybe The 356?
To be fair, it’s not a problem I think they’ll need to address.
The 355 is directed by Simon Kinberg, and stars Jessica Chastain, Lupita Nyong’o, Penélope Cruz, Bingbing Fan and Diane Kruger. Rated 12A, 123 mins.
The 355 cocktail guide
The multimedia premiere of The 355 was enlivened by some excellent themed cocktails, served by Spin and Shake, presented here for your delight and delectation…
Every movie should come with themed cocktails
Expresso Marie-o-tine Vodka, Tia Maria, Expresso, Sugar Syrup, garnished with a trio of coffee beans
Garden of Khadijah Gin, Elderflower cordial, apple juice, lime juice, soda water, garnished with fresh mint
The Gracieta Tequila, grapefruit juice, lime juice, soda water
Mace’s Martini Vanilla syrup, lime juice, passion fruit puree, pineapple juice, garnished with fresh passion fruit
The Lin Mi Royal Raspberry Liqueur, prosecco, raspberries and an edible flower garnish
Smoky Mezcals, regional Raicillas and crisp Tequilas return to London’s South Bank for the second annual Tequila & Mezcal Show. Last year, more than 600 agave enthusiasts brought the buzz, and this year promises to be even more exciting, with over 250 spirits from across Mexico gracing Glazier’s Hall. Running for two sessions on Friday…
After a sold-out tour across the UK and Ireland, Derren Brown is bringing his latest stage show Only Human to London’s West End, with a residency at the Apollo Theatre this autumn. Brown has long occupied a singular place in British theatre. Part illusionist, part psychological showman, his productions blend suggestion, storytelling and audience participation…
London isn’t short on good brunches. But very few come with this level of ultimate indulgence. The Ultimate Roast Brunch at OXBO Bankside takes everything you love about a classic Sunday and turns it into an unmissable event, with unlimited starters, a decadent roast, bottomless desserts and free-flowing bubbles, all just steps from the Tate…
The Luxe Review 
Miraculously smaller than the sum of its parts, The 355 is a patchwork quilt of frenetic action sequences, bound together with a largely nonsensical plot.
Clearly this glossy romp is meant to ape Bond and Bourne. A protracted setup involves the sale of some sort of ultra-technical macguffin that allows the user to hack any connected device, and crash planes and computer systems at whim. Scowling villain Jason Flemyng is super impressed and tries to obtain it, repeatedly. There’s quite a lot of running around, but no one seems to get anywhere.
Jessica Chastain plays Mace, a CIA operative sent to retrieve the nefarious tech, along with her agency partner Nick (Sebastian Stan), but comes a cropper when he switches sides. She duly partners with other female agents from rival secret services, also on the case, to complete her mission and kick his ass.
Directed and co-written by Simon Kinberg, based on a story by Theresa Rebeck, and produced by Jessica Chastain, the movie looks well-funded, and boasts some splendid location photography (France, Morocco, Shanghai), courtesy of DoP Tim Maurice-Jones.
The always listenable Tom Holkenberg delivers a fast-paced score, and tech credits overall are high.
The action choreography is similarly accomplished and the ensemble cast, comprising Lupita Nyong’o (as Khadijar), Penélope Cruz (Graciela), Bingbing Fan (Lin Mi Shen) and Diane Kruger (Marie Schmidt) are nothing if not committed.
But as a female orientated actioner it lacks the wit of Gunpowder Milkshake, the slick invention of Black Widow, and the sheer violent physicality of Kate.
The movie rallies in its final act, with a drawn out slobberknocker in a luxury hotel, featuring energetic gunplay and eye-catching martial arts.
Three quarters of the way through I began to wonder why The 355 was so-called. There’s no real attempt to explain it, bar some throwaway dialogue in the final reel. Then I wondered what they might call a sequel – The 3552? Maybe The 356?
To be fair, it’s not a problem I think they’ll need to address.
The 355 is directed by Simon Kinberg, and stars Jessica Chastain, Lupita Nyong’o, Penélope Cruz, Bingbing Fan and Diane Kruger. Rated 12A, 123 mins.
The 355 cocktail guide
The multimedia premiere of The 355 was enlivened by some excellent themed cocktails, served by Spin and Shake, presented here for your delight and delectation…
Expresso Marie-o-tine
Vodka, Tia Maria, Expresso, Sugar Syrup, garnished with a trio of coffee beans
Garden of Khadijah
Gin, Elderflower cordial, apple juice, lime juice, soda water, garnished with fresh mint
The Gracieta
Tequila, grapefruit juice, lime juice, soda water
Mace’s Martini
Vanilla syrup, lime juice, passion fruit puree, pineapple juice, garnished with fresh passion fruit
The Lin Mi Royal
Raspberry Liqueur, prosecco, raspberries and an edible flower garnish
Mexican spirits culture celebrated as Tequila & Mezcal Show returns to London
Smoky Mezcals, regional Raicillas and crisp Tequilas return to London’s South Bank for the second annual Tequila & Mezcal Show. Last year, more than 600 agave enthusiasts brought the buzz, and this year promises to be even more exciting, with over 250 spirits from across Mexico gracing Glazier’s Hall. Running for two sessions on Friday…
Derren Brown’s latest stage show Only Human heads to London West End after sell-out tour
After a sold-out tour across the UK and Ireland, Derren Brown is bringing his latest stage show Only Human to London’s West End, with a residency at the Apollo Theatre this autumn. Brown has long occupied a singular place in British theatre. Part illusionist, part psychological showman, his productions blend suggestion, storytelling and audience participation…
I tried London’s ultimate roast brunch – with unlimited starters, bottomless desserts and bubbles by the Thames
London isn’t short on good brunches. But very few come with this level of ultimate indulgence. The Ultimate Roast Brunch at OXBO Bankside takes everything you love about a classic Sunday and turns it into an unmissable event, with unlimited starters, a decadent roast, bottomless desserts and free-flowing bubbles, all just steps from the Tate…
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